31 years ago today I woke up as a single man for the last time.
I woke up on my own without a partner for the very last time.
31 years ago today I got married.
I barely remember the beginning of that day. The previous day had begun with me on the air as the morning man at WASP-AM (yes really) so it had begun around 5 AM. Finish work, drive an hour north to my parents place, lots of people, my car broke (lost its muffler) so it went off to the shop, rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, small bachelor/bachelorette party (night of the Holmes/Cooney fight. It was on the TV in the sports bar where we ended up). Home to collapse into bed.
The next morning I remember a back up in getting to the showers. I’m not sure being the groom got me any favors. Somehow I got dressed and made it to church. I remember peeking out the door and seeing some guy in an Air Force uniform sitting with my family and having no idea who that was (It was my cousin Jimmy. That was almost as astounding as seeing random service people).
I remember walking out to my spot. I remember thinking that I couldn’t look at Donna because I’d get the giggles. I remember walking up the aisle with my wife (my freaking WIFE!!!!) and then running back down the length of the parish hall.
I remember it feeling right.
This was a relationship that almost didn’t make it. Almost didn’t become a relationship because this amazing lady thought I was a jerk. Almost didn’t survive dating because it turned out she was right. I was a fairly typical young man kind of idiot. Insecure, immature and in completely over his head. If we survived it’s because SHE believed and she made it happen.
I did one thing right. I listened when the voice inside my head said “It’s time to propose”. I’ve spent 32 years trying to build on that single right decision.
It hasn’t been all roses and happy endings. We’ve been a team, a partnership through unemployment, illness and a premature baby’s birth. We’ve moved and laughed and struggled and cried and just held onto each other all that time. There were days when we were royally pissed off with one another. Those days disappear next to the good days. The days when my life brightens just at the sound of her voice.
I don’t know why I deserve this lady. Stop. Forget that. I DON’T deserve her and I damn well know it.
Thank you Beautiful Lady, Lady in My Life, wife, friend, lover, mother of my child, she who thinks I’m funny, bookkeeper (Thank God!), advisor and spiritual role model.
I love you.
31 more? What do you think?